Yesterday I went with my husband and son to the soccer park. I am calling it therapy because it did a little healing in me. Usually when we go to the park I sit on the side and watch them play catch. This time I got involved. This time I played catch with them. We ran, sweat, and laughed. Something I don’t do often. A huge thing lacking in my health right now is exercise. I tried to change that recently by joining my local gym here in the mountains. After a couple months they tried to mandate mask wearing inside while working out. I’m sorry but that one is going to be a hell no to me. So I canceled my membership and vowed to just start doing yoga at home and go hiking whenever possible. Well, I haven’t done any of that. Maybe a couple days of yoga here and there but nothing consistent. That is one thing, that for me it is hard to be consistent with my health. One, because I have a fast metabolism and have been slender my whole life so I thought I didn’t need to put in as much effort. Two, I have been moving homes every year if not several times a year…. for 10 whole years now. Moving is stressful, and exhausting. I have also done it without the help of family and friends through most of it all. I have also done it with a baby on my hip and dogs always around. So it has been hard to get comfortable in a town. In a space. In a gym and in a routine.
I know I am trying to make one last move again but I really want to discipline myself more. It is SO hard when I have lived a life where I have control of everything. So I have been a cool boss to myself. Letting myself off the hook and to be spoiled. But I see it. I see how a year of depression has effected me, has aged me. One of my biggest goals is to be healthy so I can stay youthful looking! So I am torn up because I also know the past year cannot be un done. I do know I can move forward and make a new start. I have a yoga, and a booty workout app on my phone. I want to start playing at the park more, even in the cold. I really need to get the weights off my Amazon wishlist soon because it will be winter and I want to spend it transforming into the best me. A huge part of my “bimbofication“ goal as in one of my last blogs… is getting fit. To make
my body toned, strong, and perfect in a way it has never been before. All I need are The tools. The motivation and the discipline. I want to feel better, I want more soccer park therapy. Something about sweating outdoors feels the best most of all. Running with my husband and son, doing human things together. Like little space monkeys aliens would watch and laugh at because we are just being silly at the park. I want to see my family get healthier too. I see how moving apartment to apartment has affected us all. Even the dogs. I want To be a sporty fit mom as I go through my life, and reach my kid healthy habits. More than anything, I just want to completely love myself.
So next time you are feeling down about whatever it may be, just go to a big empty soccer park. Play catch, run around, stretch, and breathe some fresh air. I promise you will feel better After. 💗